fivecentnickel.com » Humor http://www.fivecentnickel.com personal finance tips, tricks, and commentary Fri, 10 Feb 2012 23:28:09 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 en hourly 1 Don’t Buy Stuff You Can’t Afford http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2009/03/22/dont-buy-stuff-you-cant-afford/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2009/03/22/dont-buy-stuff-you-cant-afford/#comments Sun, 22 Mar 2009 15:19:32 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/?p=3244 Here’s some simple financial advice from SNL:

Thanks to @StephTheBlogger from Graduated Learning for the tip!

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2009/03/22/dont-buy-stuff-you-cant-afford/feed/ 4 A Bit of Auto Bailout Humor http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2008/12/30/a-bit-of-auto-bailout-humor/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2008/12/30/a-bit-of-auto-bailout-humor/#comments Tue, 30 Dec 2008 20:52:07 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2008/12/30/a-bit-of-auto-bailout-humor/ In need of some Holiday cheer? How about a bit of bailout humor?

If you don’t laugh, you’ll cry. Enjoy!

Source: Buffalo Beast

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2008/12/30/a-bit-of-auto-bailout-humor/feed/ 25 Using Credit Cards to Post Bail http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2007/12/26/using-credit-cards-to-post-bail/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2007/12/26/using-credit-cards-to-post-bail/#comments Wed, 26 Dec 2007 16:05:09 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2007/12/26/using-credit-cards-to-post-bail/ Okay, this just makes me laugh… According to a blurb in the most recent issue of Bottom Line/Personal, many jails accept credit cards for posting bail. But wait, it gets better:

“Cardholders can go home quickly – and may get reward points on their credit cards.”

So if you’re looking for another way to make use of your reward credit card, look no further than you local jail.

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2007/12/26/using-credit-cards-to-post-bail/feed/ 20 Checkbook Security: Keep an Eye on Your Checks! http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/11/07/checkbook-security-keep-an-eye-on-your-checks/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/11/07/checkbook-security-keep-an-eye-on-your-checks/#comments Tue, 07 Nov 2006 12:53:48 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/11/07/checkbook-security-keep-an-eye-on-your-checks/ Phew! That was close… We were nearly the victims of six million dollars in check fraud. And the worst part of it was that this ‘atrocity’ was perpetrated by our own children. ;) Click through for details.

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/11/07/checkbook-security-keep-an-eye-on-your-checks/feed/ 2 Brits Often Work Drunk http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/05/31/brits-often-work-drunk/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/05/31/brits-often-work-drunk/#comments Wed, 31 May 2006 15:14:20 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/05/31/brits-often-work-drunk/ Based on the results of a recent survey, millions of Brits go to work drunk (or get drunk while they’re there, I guess). More specifically, one in six Brits admit to having been “under the influence of alcohol at work in the last six months.” And to think that the World Cup hasn’t even started yet!

[Source: The Register]

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/05/31/brits-often-work-drunk/feed/ 10 You Know Gas is Expensive When… http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/04/28/you-know-gas-is-expensive-when/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/04/28/you-know-gas-is-expensive-when/#comments Fri, 28 Apr 2006 20:08:39 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/04/28/you-know-gas-is-expensive-when/ From News of the Weird:

A 40-year-old man in Cedarburg, Wis., was arrested on suspicion of DUI when police noticed the severed hose of a gas station pump sticking out of his car’s fuel door. (It belonged to a Kwik Trip station.)

Note to self: Make sure to remove the hose before pumping and running.

[Source: News of the Weird]

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/04/28/you-know-gas-is-expensive-when/feed/ 6 Dodging Taxes with a Lame Excuse http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/17/dodging-taxes-with-a-lame-excuse/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/17/dodging-taxes-with-a-lame-excuse/#comments Fri, 17 Mar 2006 20:32:09 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/17/dodging-taxes-with-a-lame-excuse/ From News of the Weird… Here’s an especially lame excuse for not paying your taxes:

James Clifford Hanna, of Canada’s Yukon Territory, argued in court in February that “James Clifford Hanna” was merely a name involuntarily given to him and that since he never officially accepted it, he can’t be forced to pay James Clifford Hanna’s taxes. (He lost.)

It’s only a matter of time until someone tries this in the United States. With a bit under a month to go until Tax Day, this could still be the year.

[Source: News of the Weird]

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/17/dodging-taxes-with-a-lame-excuse/feed/ 4 Be Careful What You Ask For http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/09/be-careful-what-you-ask-for/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/09/be-careful-what-you-ask-for/#comments Thu, 09 Mar 2006 19:07:57 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/09/be-careful-what-you-ask-for/ More News of the Weird:

In December, a self-employed market analyst in Chimacum, Wash., requested from the Internal Revenue Service a copy of the 2003 Form 1040 and instructions so he could revise an old tax return. Three weeks later, he received instead two shipments totaling 48,000 copies of 2005 Form 1040 and instructions.

Wouldn’t it be easier to just download it from the IRS web site?

[Source: Arizona Daily Star]

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/09/be-careful-what-you-ask-for/feed/ 2 Talk About an Allowance! http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/07/talk-about-an-allowance/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/07/talk-about-an-allowance/#comments Tue, 07 Mar 2006 19:06:01 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/07/talk-about-an-allowance/ Don’t you just feel terrible for this guy?

In January, Alexis du Pont de Bie Sr., 62, who grew up in a du Pont family mansion and inherited $7 million, filed a lawsuit in New York City accusing his estate’s trustees of mismanagement that has reduced his wealth to $2 million and necessitated a cut in his allowance to $3,000 a month, making him, he said, “literally destitute and homeless.”

Granted, I wouldn’t be thrilled if someone mismanaged my funds to the tune of a $5 million loss, but still… Destitute and homeless?

[Source: Arizona Daily Star]

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/07/talk-about-an-allowance/feed/ 11 Don’t Tax, But Still Spend http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/02/dont-tax-but-still-spend/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/02/dont-tax-but-still-spend/#comments Thu, 02 Mar 2006 21:07:18 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/02/dont-tax-but-still-spend/ From Chuck Shepherd’s News of the Weird:

Tax officials in Valparaiso, Ind., admitted in February that they mistakenly valued one house at $400 million (though its previous assessment was $121,900), and even though they re-computed the owner’s bill, they failed to erase from the city budget the $8 million in tax revenue they were expecting from the property, including $3 million that they already had disbursed.

Kinda makes a tax-and-spend politician sound pretty good, don’t you think?

[Source: Arizona Daily Star]

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2006/03/02/dont-tax-but-still-spend/feed/ 4 Big Box Mart http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2005/10/23/big-box-mart/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2005/10/23/big-box-mart/#comments Sun, 23 Oct 2005 19:25:17 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2005/10/23/193/ The folks over at JibJab.com are back at it with their ‘Big Box Mart’ video. Very amusing (and kind of depressing at the same time). Either hop on over to their main page, or check it out via the direct link here. Note that there’s a short ad before the video starts rolling, but it’s well worth the wait.

[Via: MightyBargainHunter]

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2005/10/23/big-box-mart/feed/ 0 Press Any Key http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2005/08/15/press-any-key/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2005/08/15/press-any-key/#comments Tue, 16 Aug 2005 02:03:47 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/?p=131 Completely off topic, but I ran across this entry in the Compaq support library the other day and found it very amusing. Apparently there’s enough dumb people in the world to warrant a FAQ entry dedicated to the idea that the phrase “press any key” actually means that you should press any one of the keys on your keyboard, as opposed to the one marked “any.” Unbelievable.

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]]> http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2005/08/15/press-any-key/feed/ 5 The Salary Theorem http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2005/06/12/the-salary-theorem/ http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2005/06/12/the-salary-theorem/#comments Sun, 12 Jun 2005 12:05:41 +0000 Nickel http://www.fivecentnickel.com/2005/06/08/the-salary-theorem/ Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.

Postulate 2: Time is Money.

As anyone who has had a physics class knows: Power = Work / Time.

And since Knowledge = Power (Postulate 1) and Time = Money (Postulate 2)…

It is therefore true that: Knowledge = Work / Money.

Solving for Money, we get: Money = Work / Knowledge

Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of Work done.

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